It will not work out if ________________

Currently listening to Boys Night Out.

Topic is: It will not work out if: 

Alright. So someone said that "It will not work out if he/she is a single parent".

So I can't help not to somehow react and to think about what the caller has said. I wouldn't say I disagree with the comment. In 5 years that I have been living a single-parent life, there was never a time that I went out on a date, and that I wasn't really interested in finding nor mingling around guys just for the purpose of falling in love, again.

But not a couple of years later, when this guy confessed that he was liking me during our college years. It was something surprising to me, felt like, at my most invisible state, someone saw me, noticed me. And the daily SMS went on for months, seeing each other in the "takas mode" since he is in a relationship. Oh yes, he is! 

I didn't see it coming that I will really say the words "I love you" to him, but I did, and the worse is that he replied, "I love you more". Maybe I enjoyed the benefits of having someone emotionally, even if not physically. Our heyday lasted for 8 months. We both decided to cut the communication just last February. 

What hurtful at this time is that I can no longer talk to him the way I do during our college days. It's like I am restricted to text him, nor to chat with him. In fact I deleted him from one of my social networking sites, making myself believe that that is the best for me since I love torturing myself by checking his profile. 

I admit that I only did all of these again because he made me feel that having a child is not a big issue because he loves me, and that my set-up right now is no longer questionable. Yet, what he feels for me, his sugar-coated words, and weak actions weren't enough to prolong what we have. 

He made me believe to hope once again. To think positively that someone would want to be with me. And that someone would love to embrace my insane persona. Guess, at the end of it all, he chose to leave me because he came to realize that  he doesn't want me anymore. That he can't stand my idealism of being realistic, which he thinks is being more of a pessimist, and above it all, he can't face the fact that he made himself deal with someone as crazy and vagabond as me. 

"It will not work out if one is not brave enough to accept any facet of you, whether you are a single parent or not".

I have lost more than what I have gained. Nakakapang hinayang yung pagkakaibigan. Seriously!